Chasing Paradise Page 4

  In her darkest hours, she had imagined not finding her mate, or finding him after she was too old to have children. Never did she imagine not being good enough for her mate once she found him.

  With fierce resolve, Gwen rose to a sitting position, wiping the tears off her cheeks. Screw that! He wasn’t good enough for her. She was successful and smart and had a good sense of humor. She managed one of the most successful shifter resorts in the world. Who the hell was he to claim she wasn’t good enough?

  A knock at the door interrupted her silent rant. She thought about ignoring it, but as if reading her thoughts, the knocking became more insistent.

  “Gwen, I can hear you crying. You’d better open this door right now or I’m breaking it down.” Alyssa’s voice drifted through the solid panel of wood. It figured her best friend would find her eventually. Gossip among the staff always spread quickly. Why would her failure be any different?

  Throwing open the door, Gwen took one look at her friend and burst into renewed sobs. Strong arms encircled her small frame and eased the door shut, enclosing them in Gwen’s room. Alyssa was her rock, the one person she knew without a doubt would always be there for her. They’d been inseparable since childhood, despite Gwen being older by three years.

  “Oh, sweetheart. What happened?”

  Gwen sniveled out the whole sordid affair between sobs, letting her anger and frustration bleed through. Shocked silence met her story until Gwen revealed what she heard in the bar.

  “Bastard!” Gwen smiled at the affronted anger expressed on her behalf. “You deserve so much better. Want me to beat him up for you? Say the word, I’ll do it. I may not look like much but I have a mean right hook.”

  “You’re a good friend, you know that?” Alyssa always knew how to cheer her up.

  “Of course I do.” Both women sat, lost in their own thoughts for a moment. “So what are you going to do now?” The quiet question hung in the air, taunting Gwen.

  What was she going to do? The thought of watching Ethan flirt with other guests and staff for the next two weeks was more painful than she could bear. She feared she wouldn’t be able to stand it. Would beg him to come back to her, destroyingher pride along with everything else. Or worse, that he’d use her and she’d be unable to resist. She couldn’t let that happen.

  Seeming to sense her distress, Alyssa bumped shoulders with her. “Don’t worry. I give him one day before he’s banging on your door again, crawling back.”

  “No.” The statement was quiet but resolved. “He doesn’t want me, Lyssa. It’s not just him denying I’m his mate. He doesn’t want a ‘woman like me’ as his mate. I’m better than that. Damn it, I deserve more than that.” Gwen was quiet for a moment, contemplating her next course of action.

  “I have some vacation days saved up. Maybe I’ll go visit Ty’s ranch in Nevada I haven’t seen him in a while.” Ty had worked at the resort for a summer a few years ago and the three had become fast friends. Gwen and Ty had even dated for a while, but it had never been serious. Both had known the other wasn’t a mate, simply good company. After he left to make his own way in the world, she’d kept in contact and they remained good friends. “Besides, it might be good to get away for a few days…or until Ethan checks out.”

  A vacation sounded like exactly what she needed. The risk of running into Ethan was too high here. It would kill her to live through the heartbreak of his words over and over. Her worst fear was that the mate attraction was a pull neither of them could resist. She deserved to be wanted for who she was, not forced into a future that would be miserable for both of them. Being alone was preferable to that fate.

  Distance was what she needed. The more distance between them, the safer they both were. It was the only option.

  * * * *

  Ethan couldn’t sit still. Lying on the beach hadn’t helped. Swimming hadn’t helped. Hell, he’d even shifted and run through the woods. Nothing eased the restlessness consuming him. There was only one cure, one thing guaranteed to still the animal inside. One woman. But when he’d searched for her, she wasn’t where he expected her to be. Nor could he find her anywhere else he looked.

  So he went back to the first place he’d looked, pacing the hallway outside Gwen’s office. His nose told him she wasn’t inside, but she had to come to work sooner or later. When she did, he’d be waiting.

  The need to see her, smell her, hold her, overwhelmed him. The feeling of being caged continued to grow as more time passed. Where the hell was she?

  “Sir, is there something I can help you with?” The voice was friendly enough, but the young otter’s eyes were cold. She looked him over with a sneer, as if finding him lacking.

  “Waiting for Gwen,” he managed to growl out.

  “I’m sorry, sir. She’s not here. I’d be happy to get our acting manager if there’s a problem you need addressed.”

  His heart skipped a beat in his chest.

  “What do you mean, she’s not here? I was just with her this morning.” If possible, the eyes looking him over grew colder, and the smile fell from her face.

  “Just what I said, she’s not here.” Even the friendliness in her voice had disappeared.

  Panic burned in his belly. If she wasn’t here, where was she? What if she’d gone for good? No, he wouldn’t accept that. She was his. Made for him, just as he was made for her. This wasn’t how things were supposed to work.

  The woman turned to leave, but Ethan caught up with her and spun her around.

  “Where is she?” Ethan demanded. He knew he was being rude, but he couldn’t care about that now. All that mattered was finding his mate.

  “She went on a little vacation of her own.” She started to turn away, but Ethan stopped her again.

  “When does she return?” A deep rumble built inside him. She hadn’t mentioned a vacation. Had last night meant nothing to her? How could she just leave after everything they’d shared? And without a damn word.

  “I believe she mentioned coming back once you checked out. Now, if that’s all, sir, I have other duties to attend to.”

  Half-mad with impatience, Ethan’s wolf had reached the end of it’s rope. Grabbing the woman by the shoulders, Ethan spun her around and demanded to know where his mate had gone. He was through denying what he wanted. He needed Gwen more than he needed his next breath. How dare she run away from him.

  If it was the last thing he did, he’d find her, and then find out why she ran. She was his mate and her place was by his side. Forever.

  * * * *

  Anger and resolve overtook her best friend’s mate. Watching it happen before her eyes was fascinating.

  The last thing she wanted to do was betray Gwen, the woman was like a sister to her. But some sixth sense compelled her to help this wolf, screamed at her that this was the right choice. He’d have to do a lot of crawling and begging to win her back after everything he’d said, but Gwen deserved her mate, deserved happiness and family. Sighing in frustration, Alyssa wrote Ty’s address down on a slip of paper and handed it to Ethan.

  “You hurt her again, I’ll castrate you,” she threatened calmly as he reached for the paper. If there had only been surprise in his gaze, she would have snatched the paper away before he could read it. But pain and determination were also in the look he shot her as he nodded. Determination to make this right. Taking the paper, the wolf ran down the hallway like the hounds of hell were following.

  Looks like Gwen is in for quite a surprise, she thought with a smile. Hopefully the wolf would live up to the faith she’d just placed in him.

  Chapter 4

  “What do you mean she’s not here?” Ethan shouted at the beefy man who answered the door. This was the address the woman had given him. Gwen was supposed to be here. It was becoming increasingly harder to maintain control. The wolf inside him was distressed and struggling to get free. Seeing another man in the same house as his mate, a mate who had run from him, was a shock he hadn’t prepared for.

  To
hear he had spent the better part of the day traveling for nothing was testing his restraint. His wolf was itching for a fight. The horse shifter in front of him might just find himself on the wrong side of his anger.

  “And who the hell are you to her, anyway?” His hands fisted, his frustration reaching its boiling point. It drove him mad seeing this male standing between him and his woman.

  The man calmly leaned against the doorway, blocking Ethan from seeing inside. Clearly, the man either didn’t know the trouble he was courting or he didn’t care. “An old friend. A good friend. But, like I said, she’s not here.”

  Taking a deep breath, Ethan strove for calm. The barest hint of an ocean breeze floated in the air. He knew that scent. Gwen.

  The shifter was lying. He didn’t know why, but he knew his nose wouldn’t. Gwen was inside and he would find her. Even if he had to go through this man to get to her.

  Everything around him took on an amber hue as his eyes shifted. His mate had run from him. Soon she’d learn running from a wolf only opened herself up for a hunt. Now that he’d cornered his prey, Ethan would make sure she didn’t escape him again. It was time to claim his mate. Right here. Right now.

  “If you don’t step aside, I will tear you apart.” His voice was more wolf’s than man’s. The shifter didn’t rush to get out of his way as expected, but stared at him, raking his eyes over Ethan from head to toe.

  “Let’s get something straight, wolf. I’m not scared of you. I’ll let you in because ultimately I believe it’s what Gwen needs, but if you hurt her, I will take you down. We clear?”

  Ethan jerked a nod. Twice today someone had stood between him and his mate. His wolf wouldn’t stand for much more. It took all his willpower not to attack him just for the pleasure of fighting.

  He couldn’t understand why Gwen was here in the first place. She should be cuddling with him in bed, wrapped up in the sheets, not trying to ditch him. What had he done so wrong to cause her to flee? The night had been as good for her as it was for him. He’d made sure of it.

  Okay, if he were honest, sneaking out of her bed the morning after such mind-shattering sex had been a shitty thing to do. But his emotions had been in turmoil. The whole reason he’d come to the resort was to escape mating, not to head straight toward it. He’d thought he had more time.

  But fate had its own schedule and, apparently, it was done waiting. Time had run out, and he had found his mate. The more he thought about it, the happier he grew. How could he be upset when he thought about Gwen? She was a beautiful, sexy, and smart woman who belonged to him. Just as soon as he claimed her.

  The sting in his gums intensified as his fangs extended, poking his lipin anticipation. He felt almost feral. Taking the stairs two at a time, Ethan followed Gwen’s scent to a room at the end of the hallway. Quietly, he eased open the door.

  She sat on the floor across the room putting clothes in the dresser drawers, her back rigid. She didn’t turn around when he entered the room and shut the door.

  “Did he leave, Ty? Thanks for chasing him away. I really don’t want to see him,” she muttered quietly, sniffling into a tissue.

  Ethan stood back examining the scene. It was obvious Gwen was upset. The anguish in her voice broke his heart. He never wanted to hear her crying again even though he knew he would at some point if they spent a lifetime together. No matter how perfect their relationship would be, or how well suited they were, tears were bound to happen. Still, he’d do everything in his power to make sure it didn’t happen often. All he wanted was to make her happy.

  Right now, he was more concerned by the cause of these particular tears. He knew it was his fault. That knowledge sat heavy on his shoulders.

  Whatever hurt he had caused Gwen, he vowed to fix it. But right now, he had a more pressing concern. No matter what boneheaded thing he’d done, he was her future mate. A mate she’d left twiddling his thumbs in California. His wolf demanded to know she’d never run from him again. There was only one way to make certain.

  He snarled as he crossed the room until he stood directly behind his woman. She stiffened at the sound and ever so slowly looked up into his yellow eyes.

  “Ethan?” she squeaked. She stood in a rush and backed away from him. A growl burst from his throat. Backing away was just another form of running in his mind. Ethan still stood between her and the exit, but seeing her running from him yet again caused something to shift inside him. Some primal side he tried to keep buried broke free.

  He stalked her until her back hit the wall behind her.

  “What are you doing here?” she whispered.

  Instead of answering, he pressed her body further against the wall with his own and leaned down, capturing her lips in a heated kiss.

  Her hands floated in the air above his chest. This was a moment of truth. Either her hands were raised to push him away or clutch him closer. Her hesitant response cut a path through the red haze of anger, allowing reality to intrude. Frustration swamped him. If Gwen didn’t acknowledge they were destined to mate, he couldn’t in good conscience take the next step. Mating was for life. It wasn’t something he would force on anyone, destiny or not. If time was what she needed, time was what she’d get. But she could damn well spend it with him. At least in the same state, if not in the same room.

  Just as he started to back off, her hands fisted in his shirt, clinging to him desperately.

  The primal beast within went wild, the scent of her arousal floating in the air around them. He pushed her roughly against the wall, his body flush against hers. Her small groan of desire caused Ethan’s need to grow impossibly larger. The clothes needed to go. Now. His hands snaked up her body, pulling her shirt up and off.

  Barely breaking contact with her lips, Ethan threw the shirt to the floor before he thrust his tongue into her mouth once more, devouring her taste. He was a starving man and Gwen was his favorite dish.

  Massaging her nipples, Ethan became frustrated with the barrier of her bra and brutally ripped the straps, shoving it down her torso and baring her breasts to his gaze.

  Without warning, Ethan leaned down and assaulted Gwen’s nipples with his tongue. Drawing one rosy peak into his mouth, Ethan sucked hard, letting her feel the edge of his teeth. A strangled moan escaped Gwen as she twitched against him.

  * * * *

  How did he do this to her? Heat engulfed her until all she could do was mewl in need. God, she was on fire. She clung to Ethan’s shoulders, her nails sharpening as her inner animal clawed toward the surface.

  This rough side of Ethan was completely opposite from the calm, collected party guy she’d met the night before. But damned if she didn’t like it.

  She would have laughed if she had the breath for it. Like it? Hell, she didn’t just like it. She worshipped it. This man demanded and took until Gwen could do nothing but offer him anything he wanted.

  The tender peaks of her breasts brushed against his shirt as he moved back up her body, capturing her mouth once again. The delicious flame of desire in her belly burned brighter.

  The brush of his clothing against her naked skin set her on fire. Her hands moved toward his shirt buttons, but before she reached the first one, she found her hands raised above her head and held against the wall. The helpless pose pushed her breasts out, opening her further to Ethan’s caresses.

  The vulnerable position, as well as the small grunts he was making, caused a blast of renewed heat through her blood. The whole thing felt so…primal. Gwen had never been more turned on. She moaned and thrust her breasts against him.

  He understood her silent plea. Clutching her hands in one of his, he reached down with his other to remove her skirt. He struggled for a moment and Gwen was sure he’d have to release her hands to work the zipper. The wall scraped against her back as she writhed against it. This was taking too long.

  A tearing sound rent the air.

  The sound cleared some of the haze of desire from her brain. Opening her eyes, Gwen looked down in s
hock. Ethan’s claws were out and her skirt lay shredded on the floor, completely ruined. A protest rose to the surface--that was an expensive skirt--but his mouth covered hers before the words left her mouth. Argument forgotten, she sank into him with a moan as his tongue tangled with hers. Need returned with a vengeance, drowning her in longing.

  Without warning, he tore his mouth away from hers and buried his face against her throat. She mewled in protest, animal instinct driving her now. Why did he always pull away when she needed him? His breath fell hot and heavy against her neck as his hands gripped her hips, stilling their movements.

  “Stop me now if you don’t want this, Gwen. I can’t stop if we go any further,” Ethan whispered against her skin.

  Stop? Gwen could no more stop this than she could stop breathing. If Ethan pulled away now, she’d spontaneously combust.

  “Please, don’t leave me.” Gwen didn’t care that she begged. She needed Ethan. She needed her mate. The past hours had been torture as her otter yearned for her wolf.

  Pausing only to unzip his pants, Ethan thrust into Gwen without removing them. There was something wicked about being naked and fucked against a wall by a man fully clothed. His groan joined hers. The feel of him inside her, the delicious stretch as her body struggled to accommodate him, brought tears of pleasure to her eyes. As Ethan pulled Gwen’s legs up, wrapping them around his waist, he slid deeper, sending shards of pleasure through her body.

  * * * *

  “Never. I’m never leaving you and you’re never leaving me again. You’re mine, Gwen.” Ethan continued thrusting inside her, his cock pulsing with impending release. His release burned in his balls as he struggled to hold it back. He wasn’t going to last, his lust was too great. When his muscles tightened, he knew he was out of time. Before he could let go, he needed to finish the mating.

  “Who do you belong to, Gwen?”